Boredom, Tests and More! [Open]

He looked at her, quietly. To a cat lover, it would be a familiar expression. "But... But pets." the expression seemed to say. "W...Well... I mean.. It's just.. very relaxing... a..and nice is all.." he said, quietly. "And yeah I uh... I asked some of the culture people in the squad what to use on it." He absentmindedly rubbed his head, thinking of how annoying it was to take proper care of hair. Admittedly, it was sort of soft on its own. At her questioning about Librom, he pulled it out and handed it to her, confident she wouldn't find anything too bad without knowing how. "Sure, look through. Look for any book or any sort of stuff you might want to find. If I've scanned it, it's in there."

"I suppose I could do more. But it would be rather odd to keep petting you like that, we did only just meet and it is a sign of comforting affection between people... A more intimate one." Lakshmi's tone was a kind one, but she did pet his head softly. "But... it is fine with me. You are adorable enough."

Flipping through the book with one hand, she thought of a few things and ended up reaching their pages. The glasses slipped down her nose a bit as she read up on statistics about a few people in the seireitei who she knew. The information in here was impeccable. "Oh wow. This is rather interesting and so much easier than notes..."

He blushed just a little bit. "O-Oh. I didn't mean to say.. I mean, it's not.. uh... uhhh..." He sighed and just sort of .... went down, laying on the seat relaxed as she pet his hair. He curled up a bit, resisting the urge to sidle up next to her. There was maybe some element of Hideki's head that said he was being far too informal with the captain at the moment, but that got lost in the comfort dimension he was currently occupying.

"Uh..huh.." He said dreamily. "It's got loooots of stuff in there." He said helpfully, giving a contented little grumble.

Hideki was like a little kitten. Lakshmi smiled and stifled a small laugh that wanted to escape her at this thought. If she petted his head enough he would probably sleep here. She was enjoying his zanpakuto though sometimes there were odd notes written on the sides.

Thinking about a patient of hers, she got a full page of information that she was intrigued at the amount in it. "It really does, this is so amazing. Do you mind if I borrow it for longer?"

Her hand continued to play with his hair as she spoke, entranced in reading the information that she could find in such a fun zanpakuto.

"Hremmgerfd." He mumbled something, scooting closer to her on the couch, he absentmindedly lifted his head and rested it on her leg, just trying to get comfy on instinct. "Eh?" His eyes were closed totally now too and he gave a little wave. "Yeah, yeah. That's fiiine. Just don't look through my doodles." He said, smacking his lips in relaxation, resting his head into her leg, on the brink of sleep.

"You can doodle in here? I see... I shall stay away." Lakshmi bit back a grin, as she continued to play with his hair. In a bit she would leave him a present. He was happy and comfy, just like a little kitten. She pictured him with cat ears on and had to laugh more.

"Do you have Taichos in here? Could I look through those?"

He stretched, unaware of the kitten comparison, turning a little as he nuzzled into her leg. So soft and firm. So warm. So... "flarblgarbles". He said gesturing up at her. His tone was almost lecturing. "A few." He managed to say in english. He curled his legs up, forming a little ball up against her, before slipping off into unconsciousness with a curt little "mrow" noise.

...He was a kitten. He was a fluffly little kitten in human form and Lakshmi resisted the urge to hug him to her again. Such a dear little young man.

Deciding it was fine to look at patient's files as long as it wasn't anything too incriminating, the Taicho happily flipped through the pages and devoured data. In a bit she'd grab a pen and make some notes for the young man as well as some doodles.

Hideki fell off into fluffy dreamland, gently floating down until he settled into a nice pleasant bouncy castle. He crawled out of the bouncy castle with a groan. "Where am I?"

He was answered by a talking rabbit carrying a flamethrower which.. seemed to be burning flying mailbox bats. Yeah. That made sense. Good rabbit fighting the good fight against mailbox bats. "You're in the Fairskin woods. They're in the south of bounceland, which is the largest country in Softopia."

"Oh. Yeah, that makes sense. Uh...Why am I here?"

"Oh. That's easy." He burned a mailbox out of the sky, which fell to the ground and coughed up some letters in its dying breath.

"You have to rescue the librarian prince from the Harime wizard. To do that, you'll need to first vanquish the fearsome queen Yuzuki. Then you'll need to deal with the Snackwitch Lakshmi to the north in Headrubopolis."

He nodded. "Okay... Yeah.. And to the west? What of Cute's Valley?" He said, recalling places that didn't exist now.

"Ah, there you will have to cross the "Does she even have those feelings" desert and climb "I don't know about the stuffed animal" tower to defeat Princess Narue. Only then will you receive God-Emperor W.K.'s sword, the mighty "Stop talking to girls all the time and get back to work"-Blade.

"I will not fail you, good rabbit."

"See that you don't. OR I WILL BURN YOU!" The rabbit turned on him with the flamethrower and Hideki ran screaming through the woods.

While Hideki fought off his apparently unwanted harem dreams, Lakshmi was gently doodling in his book. Her drawings were awful, but she tried to draw a kitty Hideki. It worked, which was honestly about the extent of her artistic talents in that way. She could draw diagrams and models... but something entirely made up? It wasn't her best talent. Like singing. Wondering if he had any musical books she could read, Lakshmi used the trick she had learned from him to try and find some. It wasn't uncomfortable, having such an adorable person on her lap. The Taicho felt content.

"You cannot overcome my mighty TSUN-BLASTER!" The mighty queen Yuzuki said, opening her mouth and letting loose a terrifying shriek that rippled shockwaves through the castle.

The mighty warrior Hideki was dressed in light, cat themed armor, complete with chainmail hood that had small cat ears attached to it. Even dream Hideki felt like maybe it was a little too cute. He dropped to his knees, covering his ears. "UGH! IT'S... SO ANNOYING! BUT IT WON'T STOP ME!" He said, dragging himself to one foot.

Then the mighty queen smirked. "That was just to lower your guard for... DERE-WAVE!" She shouted, an aura blasting across the room.

Hideki fell onto his back, trying to swat at the attack. "N..NO! SHE'S JUST... TOO ADORABLE!"

---

On the couch, Lakshmi would notice poor Hideki had lifted his hands and was seeming to swat at something in front of him, twitching as if he were attacking something. "mrgrrfar... butIdunwannabeacat..."

Hideki drastically tried to pull his leg out of the peppermint and caramel muck. He looked over his shoulder. Oh god. The snackwich was going to attack again. "Hey there, lieutenant." Why did she use that phrase? He'd never made it to officer status in the Harime Knights! "You want some snaaaacks?" Ooh. He did like Snacks.

"Don't look, Hideki!" A tiny white Samoyed peeked out from the travel bag on Hideki's back. Fluffydog, the incarnate form of all of queen Yuzuki's adorableness had been his faithful companion for some time now. "If you look at her boobs, you'll turn to stone." Hideki saw the edges of fabric that could only be cleavage out of the corner of his eye.

"Bu...But how do I stop her!" He cried, freeing his leg.

"Don't worry, Hideki! I will do something incredibly stupid, somehow lodging me waaay down in your subconscious!" Fluffydog said, before hopping out of his bag and doing the most adorable little trot over to the Snackwitch.

"Nooooooo! FLUFFFYDOOOOOOG!" As the doggie walked over to the snackwitch and looked up. The snackwitch leaned down. "Awwww! Aren't you cuuuute!" And the brave fluffydog did a little dance before turning to stone. The snackwitch was not turned to stone, but neither could she look away from the eternal adorable fluffydog. Thus they were locked that way for all eternity.

"I will never forget your sacrifice fluffy doooog..." Hideki sank to his knees, knowing only now true sadness.

Oh man, there was so much candy here!

Hideki trudged up the stairs of the desert tower. Every step, the tower seemed to echo out. "Ehhhh." Step. "I dunno..." Step. "I mean..." Step. "Like..." God, this tower was annoying. And he had to do it alone. Two of the mighty Flirt-Orbs were in his bag and only the third remained. He would claim it now and fulfill his destiny.

He fell to his knees, nearly passing out from exhaustion. This desert had truly drained him. First, he had to hunt down a camel. Sure. but then when he got to the desert, he had to give the camel a piggy back ride. The camel was actually like... light as air. But I mean... come on, dream world. This was weird, even for you. He finally rose to his feet, turning to enter the Princess' chambers. He steeled his gaze, prepared for combat. His last victory had come at a heavy price. He was prepared for anything. Even death.

He stepped forward and placed his hand on the door.

When suddenly it opened.

A woman, pale as the snow, with black hair leaned out. She showed no signs of monstrosity, but still seemed, in some way, vampiric to him. He opened his mouth to speak before the strange being blew suddenly in his face. "'Ey. Kid. Buzz off, would you? I'm trying to do my thing over here."

Hideki stared blankly, eyes fluttering a few times. "I... Wh.."

"You're here for the whatever orb, right? Just... Here..." The woman tossed an orb in an arc to Hideki's hands. "Shoo, I'm trying to work."

"...B.." The vampire gave a dismissive wave and shut the door.

The harime wizard, lightning crackling from its black cloak floated through the air, firing bolts at the brave knight. Raising his sword to block, his swords blade rang as if singing "PARTY PARTY PARTY, I WANNA HAVE A PARTY, I NEED TO HAVE A PARTY!" The song rallied Hideki's spirits, continuing as he forced the sword back, turning the lightning back on his attacker.

The Harime wizard plunged to the ground. Lying in a heap. Hideki ran over to the collapsed figure and raised his sword. He had to remember the mighty words of power the King had taught him. He raised the sword up in a downward position. "DESTROY! BUILD!" He plunged the sword down into the Harime Wizard. "DESTRROOOOOOYYYY!" Light exploded out of the sword where it impaled the wizard, before the fiend fell still.

Hideki turned and walked over to the ritual desk where the Librarian Prince was to be sacrificed. He reached over and pulled out its mighty drawer.. And inside...

Was him... In... A dress... Okay...

"Um..."

The other him rose from the drawer and extended his arms. "I am the Librarian Princess. Thank you Hideki, for sav-"

"Woah woah woah. I was supposed to save the Librarian PRINCE!"

"No, the rabbit said Princess!"

"No he fucking didn't!"

The rabbit hopped into view. "Well, I did now." He hopped away again.

"THE FUCK!" Hideki threw his hands up. "Why am I in a fricking DRESS!"

"I ain't happy about it either, sister." The Librarian Prince/ss said with a scowl. "Wait... Where's the Harime Wizard?" He looked about frequently.

"What? I killed the Harime Wizard. Over there." The Prince/ss looked around him to see.

"Dude, that's not the fucking Harime Wizard."

"It's not?"

"No! That's fucking dickmunch Craig!"

Hideki ran over and threw back the hood. "GOD DAMN IT CRAIG! Well... Where's the Harime Wizard?!"

"Uhhh.... there?" The Prince/ss pointed behind Hideki.

Hideki stumbled back towards the other him. "Wh... Why are you doing all of this, Harime Wizard?"

The hooded figure descended from the sky, only the mouth visible. There was an ominous crackling before finally.. The figure shrugged. "I'unno... I was bored and I figured 'Hey. Two Hidekis and one wears a dress.' It seemed like a good idea."

"Are you shitting me?! I had to slay or... otherwise work around... like three super powerful foes to get here! For that?"

"Well, pfft. I don't want any of those bitches trying to take any of my Hidekis. I didn't scrounge up two so I could share and only have one!" The cloaked figure threw its hands up. "Obviously!"

Hideki leaned towards the Prince/ss. "This dream seems REALLY narcissistic. Should I be learning something from this?"

"You think I know? I've been in that drawer like. The whole time, basically."

Hideki turned back to the Harime witch. "So.... What.. now I just have to... be some robed figure's boyfriend for eternity?"

The Harime Wizard tipped their head to the side. "Hm? Oh, I can take the robe off." They said with a little laugh.

Suddenly the rabbit appeared again. "WAIT, DON'T! HIDEKI LOOK AWAY! TIME PARADOOOX!"

"Whu?" Hideki turned and looked up at the Harime Wizard as they removed their robe, wind kicking up, light spilling from within. Inside... Inside was...

-----

Hideki suddenly sat up with a start. "OHMIGODLITCHIFACEMARRYME!" He spat out in a single blur of words, completely indistinguishable to anyone. He panted, clearly winded and shaking, having awoken from some sort of nightmare or intense dream. He tried to recall. There'd been... knights... doggy? A robe... What was inside the robe. It was important right?.... Nah... It was gone. Crap.

He laid back down on the couch, head resting on Lakshmi's leg again, but wide awake this time. "Heya. Sorry. Weird dream. Read anything good?"

That movement with his hands drew the Taicho's attention for a moment as she smiled softly. A small giggle escaped her before she stifled it. No need to wake up the poor boy. She was having fun with his zanpakuto so he could sleep more.

Many whiles later and completely entranced in this old thesis on spiritual interactive fields and their use in 'modern' healing when she felt Hideki move slightly before he startled her with his movement. "Wah!? Oh... Hideki is everything fine."

She frowned as he laid back down, and then chuckled as her smile returned. "Yes I found quite a few things, thank you. No need to apologize. However I should apologize to you, my legs are quite asleep and I should get up."

(OOC: That dream has me laughing so hard. Thank you it was amazing.)

"Hm? Oh." He sat up, frowning a little though she wouldn't be able to see it. After that crazy dream, his appreciation of her leg pillow had grown. He stood up and yawned, giving a stretch before, feeling revitalized, he bounced on his feet a little.

"So what are you reading now?" He asked, curious what she'd gotten into. Hopefully she hadn't figured out how to freely look for things in the book besides works he had scanned. He couldn't imagine it would be less than awkward if she found his doodle section.

"Just a treatise on spiritual matters. You have a large range of topics on this. It is rather interesting, indeed." Slipping from the couch, the Taicho stretched her body out with a yawn as she stood. A glance out her window brought a surprise and she had to sigh. His book was promptly handed back as she snapped it closed, a teasing smile on her face. "You slept for quite a while, it seems to have gotten much later than I expected. I do have to go now, but if you wish to visit again... I would not stop you. Maybe next time you can learn some things about me, hm?"

"I'm interested by such a wide variety of things, that basically anything I think I'll ever get around to reading in the next, y'know... thousand years, I scan and then it's in the book." He accepted his zanpakuto back from her, slipping it into his uniform. "Ah? Oh. Wow. You aren't kidding." He did another little twisting stretch. "Well. I already wish to visit again, so I'm sure I will sometime." He said with a pleasant grin and a little laugh.

"Oh? I'm looking forward to it, Lakshmi!" He said, before glancing at the door. "Well. I don't want to hold you up and I have plenty of time to visit later so..." He stepped over and gave her a quick hug before heading for the door, with a little salute. "Have a good evening!" He gave another cheery grin then disappeared out the door.