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 Obie in Blunderland

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Shnaks

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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Wed Jan 07, 2015 2:04 pm

She titled her head. "What?" Isn't it best to assume that- oh for. "Yes, of COURSE it's best to assume that. Duh?" She smacked her forehead to emphasize her point. Funnily enough she wasn't messing with him this time. "That doesn't mean you should be afraid though. It just means you need to be prepared to kill them first. That's all." She gave a little 'pffft' noise.

"You're fine. How old are you?" She couldn't tell with these shinigami, but if he was older than 14, he needed to grow up. That's how old SHE was when SHE needed to start putting people down. "Besides. You realize like 99% of people in Soul Society have died, right? You're living on a higher plane then these people. THEY should be afraid of YOU." He had super ghost powers. How was he not on top of this?

"Look, let's go get you some booze. You should calm down then." She nodded. Yes. Some liquor would help him relax.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Wed Jan 07, 2015 5:53 pm

“Owww…” Obie said softly, slowly rubbing the spot that Esme thumped on his head. [i]Why did she do that for… Wait, did she say something about killing?! “But… I don’t want to kill anyone before they kill me! And I don’t want anyone to kill me either!” Obie’s eyes were wide in shock at her suggestion. That wasn’t why he was in the 4th division at all! 4th Division heals people! Killing is bad!

“I-I’m… I’m 107 years old…” He said, looking down, slightly embarrassed. He realized that he was pretty young compared to almost every other Shinigami in Soul Society, but here he was the newbiest of all the newbies. Esmeralda clearly had tons more experience than Obie did. “B-But, I know that the other Shinigami are a-already dead, b-but they died already though! So that’s why d-dying is so scary.” People afraid of Obie? Pfffffft. They’d sooner be afraid of a rabbit wearing a pancake as a hat before they’d be afraid of him.

Wait, booze? “W-Wait, booze? Oh no, I shouldn’t! W-When I drink I get sleepy and everything and I’d really rather not fall asleep in spooky Human World, aww…” But no matter what he said, Obie knew that he wouldn’t be able to go against Esme’s wishes. She’d probably hat assassinate him if he tried…
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Thu Jan 08, 2015 2:53 am

She turned and started walking, already deciding on this course of action. "107 and you never went to the human world? You're an odd rabbit." She said with a chuckle. She twirled her parasol overhead, before glancing back. She looked back up to the parasol before extending it in one hand towards him. "Here. I think you might need this more than I do." She said flatly. She wasn't crazy about the sun but at least she wasn't albino... also hierro.

"What I'm saying is, like... Look, if you wanted, nobody on this plane of existence could even SEE you. And you can float in the air and go through walls and tons of other shit that's scary to them. Not to mention Kido? And your Zanpakuto power? What is your Zanpakuto power, actually?" She was curious. They all had different ones, right?
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Thu Jan 08, 2015 10:32 am

Obie sighed deeply and followed behind Esme as she walked. Yep, no way he was getting out of this. “B-But wait! I’m not a… I’m not a rabbit, awww…” He said, whining softly. Normally he would protest more against being labeled a rabbit by a strange hat assassin lady, but at this point what could he do? He flinched softly as she handed the parasol, but after looking at carefully he slowly reached out and took it, thankfully shielding him more from the sun.

“O-Oh, thank you… But I um, really never have been to the Human World before. It just seemed… way too scary? Soul Society is just so much safer, a-and traveling to a completely new world that I’ve never been to before just seemed terrifying to me.” So many strange faces! And the noise, noise, noise! Way too terrifying for poor little Obie, as today had clearly proven so far.

“But I don’t want to s-scare anyone or anything! I just thought a gigai w-was necessary for traveling here… The only reason I even came here was because everyone thought I could use some e-experience in the Human World, oh…” But… not being seen by anyone and being able to move freely would be kinda nice… And maybe less scary? I don’t know “B-Besides, my kido’s not all that great, and my zanpakuto probably won’t even work all that well here, a-aww…”

Was it even okay to discuss such things with an unknown Arrancar Hat Assassin? She already seemed to know so much about Shinigami, so… maybe? She’ll probably get an answer out of him anyway… “I um, I c-can kinda control the earth a little… And sense vibrations in the dirt and stuff. But I haven’t seen any dirt around here since I landed so, I dunno…”
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Mon Jan 12, 2015 3:07 pm

Esmer glanced back, with a furrowed brow and a questionable little crooked expression on her face. "What's scary about it? And what's safer about Soul Society? In the Rukon, they still have BANDITS. If a group of guys decides to roll in with swords and take all of your stuff, there's not much anyone can do to stop it. Here? I mean, look around. It's hectic, but just look. All of these people are living their lives because this world is almost HILARIOUSLY safe. In some places anyway."

Sure, there were places in the human world that made the Rukongai look like disney land. But here? This wasn't one of them. People could practically let their kids go out at night. "I'm just saying, there's nothing from this world that even COULD hurt you. A hollow could be dangerous, but they're not FROM this world. Humans with spiritual powers COULD be dangerous, but the only ones who don't like shinigami are Quincy and they live across the planet so I guess just stay out of Canada?" She shrugged.

"Besides." She thumped the ground with her foot. "There's still plenty of dirt. It's just a little further down than you might be used to."
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Mon Jan 12, 2015 4:02 pm

“I-I don’t know… It’s just that um, anything that I don’t really know for sure is kinda spooky I guess… A-And bandits are one of the reasons I don’t leave Seireitei either! I just… I’m happy working in the Fourth and being in my garden, r-really.” Despite the fact that Esme was trying to reassure Obie that the Human World was relatively safe, the fact that he was drafted into doing her “dirty work” in the first five minutes of him arriving in the world, and was now being escorted to a bar with a spooky Hat Assassin who was also an Arrancar was fighting quite hard against it.

Not that he would tell her that though. She seemed to be in a not-destroying-Obie mood, and that’s a perfectly fine one for him at the moment. BUT WHY ARE THERE SO MANY THINGS THAT COULD HURT ME IN THIS WORLD? AND WHAT WAS A CANADA AND WHY DOES IT HATE ME?! Obie flinched slightly at her list of things that could hurt him and subconsciously moved a little closer towards her, as if being closer to a Hat Assassin would ward off any possible future attacks. “I-I’m sure there’s dirt somewhere but I… I just really only have experience with stuff that I can, well, see. I can’t really go and plant anything in this stone or whatever…” Obie sighed, feebly stomping on the ground as well.

She hasn’t killed me yet… So… Maybe, trying to get to know her would make her… not want to kill me? I mean, it’s worth a shot? “B-By the way my name is um, O-Obie Hogosha. I-If you care, that is… If you don’t that’s fine too, you could just um, forget it or whatever…” Oh god this is the first Arrancar that I’ve met now that I think about it. Oh god oh geez and it might be my last too oooohhhh deaa- Nonono Obie. Must… try not to freak out and anger her. Must try VERY hard.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Thu Jan 15, 2015 5:00 pm

Esmer shook her head and sighed. She supposed some people were just born without spines. This poor kid was clearly one of them. But she was bored and he was clearly too cowardly to even prank, so she might as well lend him a hand. Or at least give him booze. Really, it wasn't so much that she looked down on him for his fear. She just didn't understand it. There was nothing really TO fear here.

"I think I mentioned it already, but my name is Esmerelda Romassa, the Quatra Espada. And it's... erm........ to meet you, Obie Hogosha." It wasn't that it WASN'T nice to meet him or anything, but she was already buying booze for this kid, she didn't need to be super polite. "So you're in Squad 4. That's... what, the gardening squad?" She asked, feigning ignorance.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Fri Jan 16, 2015 10:56 am

“O-Oh, the um, Quatro Espada… That’s like the fourth one or something, r-right?” At least so much as Obie remembered from his studies. All he knew is that since the ceasefire between all the factions things had been going well enough. He was never taught that the Espada were a bunch of Obie-eating monsters, so other than the whole “Hat Assassin” business there was nothing really for him to worry about. Maybe? Maybe.

Esme’s comment about the ‘garden division’ did elicit a small chuckle out of him, however. “Umm, it’s actually the Medical Division. I kinda… make the salves that people need for healing and everything. Being in the garden is really just a hobby that I do in the meantime and stuff. That way I can, you know, kinda have my work and play in the same place a-and everything. It makes the day kinda… fun and stuff.” Obie reached up and scratched his cheek, nervously trying to ease himself into not panicking the whole time.

“What um, do you do as the Quatro, Miss Esmeralda? I don’t really know too much about a lot of Arrancar stuff, sorry…” Yes, good job Obie! Find common ground, be less afraid! Maybe! Anything to not anger the Hat Assassin!
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:57 pm

Esmer glanced back as they neared the bar. "Hm? Yes. Good to see you know numbers in spanish." She said with some playful derision. It wasn't really fair to pick on the kid for asking questions... but it WAS funny. She giggled slightly under her breath. Very funny. She should be a comedian. Hm. Had she ever tried that before? Well, not sober at least. To be fair, she would probably be better at it drunk. Ehhh, but not blackout drunk. Then you just start screaming at the audience and probably kill someone.

She looked back at Obie who seemed to be asking her something. What did she do? "Hm? Oh sorry, I wasn't really listening." She said very matter of factly as if that were completely fine. "And I do lots of things!" Specifically, she was their spymaster, but well. It wasn't very good spymastering to go telling everyone you're the spymaster if they don't already know it.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Sat Jan 17, 2015 3:23 pm

Umm, what's a Spanish? I just... I just know what they mean from my lessons, aww... The bar was getting closer in Obie's view, not that he would really be able to tell, though. Humans still looked all the same for him at the moment. Maybe one day he'd get more used to them, but ahahahah let's not get ahead of ourselves already.

And then she wasn't really even listening to him! That was... well that was kinda rude. A-Aww... "O-Oh, that's... that's fine, I guess. I suppose that lots of things are important to, or something." Parts of Obie's brain were trying to rationalize that meant that Hat Assassin wasn't off the list of stuff she could do, but he desperately tried to think of... other things.

"S-So um... Miss Esmeralda? Not that I'm ungrateful or anything but... Why are you taking me to a bar? I-I mean I'll have a drink or whatever if you want me to but um, I was just curious why you chose, well, me?" I mean... I can really only have one drink before I start to get all sleepy and stuffs. Oh dear, I hope she doesn't get mad at me if I get that way! Maybe... Maybe we'll just have a nice talk! Yeah!
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Mon Jan 19, 2015 8:59 pm

Esmerelda made a small derisive 'tch' noise. He supposed? She was the head of fucking Intel for the entire Las Noches. She had put a spy sattelite into SPACE over this rock. 'he supposed'. She blew her bangs out of her eyes and kept walking till they reached the door, stopping at the entrance. Hm? What was he...

"Eh? Why did I.." She shook her head. "I didn't choose diddly squat. I was bored when you wandered by. I tried to have some fun because you were going on about Hat Assassins which are not even VAGUELY a real thing by the way, fun which you TOTALLY spoiled and so now I'm trying to relax with a trip to a bar, which you are destroying with questions." She huffed. She was trying to be civil and friendly, but he just would not chiiiillllll.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Mon Jan 19, 2015 9:55 pm

"O-Oh..." So... that's what this was all about. "Ohhh... sorry." Obie sighed deeply and lowered his shoulders. W-Well umm... Let's focus on the positives? Hat Assassins aren't a real thing, that's good. Um, Ummm... Yeah that was about it for the good news. Oh, she still hadn't killed him yet! Another good one! Hard to forget that one. "I-I'm sorry, Miss Esmeralda. I'll be quiet now."

And quiet he was, as Obie stood at the entrance with her, twiddling his thumbs rapidly as he stood in place, trying not to sneak looks over at Esmeralda to make sure she wasn't still mad at him (because she probably totally was) Ohhh... I'm never too good at these sorts of things. Normally I'd try to open with a nice conversation but that just seems to make her ANGRIER and that just I don't want that to happen nope. So I just need to... stay here? Yeah.

So Obie stood nervously in place in front of Esmer, thumbs twiddling faster as he occasionally opened his mouth to say something, but rapidly closed it back lest he anger her again.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Tue Jan 20, 2015 7:27 pm

Esmerelda watched him quietly twiddle his thumbs and mutter a few things, her foot tapping. Good lord, even when he was quiet, he was motor mouthing. Her foot tapped a little faster as his thumbs twiddled at a higher speed. "It's fine, let's just go in." She insisted before walking past him into the bar. She sat down at a table, gesturing for him to take the other seat.

She flagged down a waitress. "Miss, I'd like two Long Island Iced Teas stat, thank you very much." She insisted, before turning to Obie, assuming he'd be coming. "You should enjoy these. They're nice." Nice and alcoholic as fuck was more like it. Maybe once he got drunk he'd calm the hell down.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Tue Jan 20, 2015 10:07 pm

Obie nodded quickly and followed closely behind Esmeralda, sneaking glances at every corner of the bar to try and get his bearings in this strange, new place. Oh geez oh dear now there's walls, lots of walls around... And more people! Nono wait, calm yourself Obie. Miss Esmeralda wouldn't let you die in the human world, right? ...Can I die in the Human World? Oh I don't want to think about this right now lalala!

He carefully took the seat across from Esme, giving the waitress a small, polite but terrified nod as she walked by. "T-Thank you..." he managed to squeak out before she left. Okay, positives time! Umm... Well no-one looked obviously spooky? That was pretty good to Obie. Nice soft lights, another plus! And it sounded like Esmeralda ordered some kind of tea for them to drink as well! Well that was mighty fine of her to do, indeed.

Maybe... Maybe Miss Esmeralda is just rough around the edges? S-She seems to mean well, so maybe? Oh god I hope for maybe...

"T-Thanks again, Miss Esmeralda..." Obie said softly, looking down at the table's surface. It looked like it was some sort of hard, grey material. Not wooden like all the other bars Obie was used to. Well, not really used to. Be he had been in a few of them back at the Rukon.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Fri Jan 23, 2015 8:52 pm

She gave a dismissive wave. "Think nothing of it. Least I could do for dragging you all over the place." Besides, she wasn't planning to pay for it anyway. She looked around, seeing if anything interesting was up. Ugh. Nice crowd, soft lights. This place was boring. She turned her attention back to Obie and frowned. "Please, stop thanking me." She said with another dismissive wave. It was exhausting all this politeness.

Soon the waitress brought their drinks out. Esmerelda picked hers up and sipped at it. You could barely taste the metric shitload of alcohol in it. "Well. To your first time in the human world." She said, raising her glass for Obie to tink his against as a sort of toast. "Hopefully in the future, you don't let anyone convince you hat assassins are real." She said with a bit of a devious little laugh.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Sat Jan 24, 2015 12:25 pm

"O-Oh, right..." Obie nodded. Also almost literally dragging around, as well. Okay, well maybe not physically dragging around, but she did threaten to do... things to him if he didn't help her with her whatever was going on. And that creepy bat... Obie shivered slightly. Why did it have to be a creepy bat?! "Well um, t-thank y- Oh, umm... Okay."

Obie was now trapped in his own personal politeness hell unable to thank someone for their hospitality. But... how do I show that I'm grateful?! Is this  a trap? OH GOD WHAT DO I DO. I JUST WANT TO BE NICE AND THANK MISS ESMERALDA FOR NOT DESTROYING ME ON THE SPOT AAAAAAAA

He settled with simply nodding his head and gripping his drink tightly when the waitress finally brought them to the table. It... certainly looked like tea? Obie never knew that bars would also serve you tea, so this was a nice and welcome little change. Little surprises like this were nice! Compared to running into Hat Assassins and running in and out of a big human building.

Noticing Esme's attempt at a toast, Obie carefully lifted his own glass to clink against hers as he smiled tentatively at the Arrancar. "R-Right! Um... I hope that if I do come back here things will be less... spooky. Yeah." He brought his glass back down to his lips and took a small sip to test the drink, his smile growing slightly more genuine as the taste hit his tongue. "Oh, this is... nice!"
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Tue Jan 27, 2015 2:17 am

Esmerelda glanced at Obie again. Spooky? She giggled a little. Not the happy, friendly kind of giggle. The horror movie kind of giggle. Her eyes almost seemed to shine as she grinned deviously at him before taking a sip of her drink. A long sip. More of a 'downing' really. She snapped her fingers, for the server to bring her another. She had an awfully high tolerance, with the arrancar fortitude and what not.

"Are you saying you'd prefer not to run into me next time? Why Mr. Obie. I'm absolutely hurt." She said indignantly, holding a hand to her chest and looking away, as if struck. She giggled again, eyeing her empty drink and wishing the server would AH! HERE THEY WERE! She happily took the drink and sipped at it.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Tue Jan 27, 2015 12:51 pm

Obie continued to take small, tentative sips of his “tea” as Esmeralda did her very spooky laugh. Why did she have to spooky laugh? Obie didn’t know. But it suuuuure was spooky. Really… spooky… Obie sighed softly after taking his latest sip, his own glass now only half-way gone compared to Esme downing hers quite quickly.

Wow… She must be… Really thirsty. Yeah… He could already feel his eyelids begin to droop slightly as the alcohol broke through his pretty weak tolerance. If it was any other kind of alcoholic beverage, he might have been able to take a few. But instead they went all out with the Long Island Iced Tea, and Obie most likely wouldn’t be able to get past the first one without passing out onto the table. Not being able to pick up on Esme’s obvious joking; Obie slowly shook his head back and forth.

“Nonono, that wasn’t what I meant at all… It’s just… I dunno. Maybe a day where someone could just show me some quieter parts of the human world or something…” He slowly propped his head up on the table with one arm, his other hand still holding on to the glass. “I’m sure that another day running into you wouldn’t be bad? Since you’re not a hat assassin? I don’t know, nuh-uh…”

Obie had at least calmed down a bit at this point, with his thumbs no longer twiddling and the rest of his body language toned down from his previous twitchy behavior. “I’ll need a better hat, though…”
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Tue Jan 27, 2015 6:35 pm

Esmer glanced at him, sipping away at his drink. Please, what kind of way was that to drink. You'd think it was actual tea, the way he was imbibing it. She got her second one and immediately took a long sip of it, not planning to down this one quite as quickly as her previous. "Well, I'm not much good for tours. The last time I tried to show someone around a zoo, we wound up screwing before we got through three exhibits." She said with a shrug, not thinking much of it.

She looked up to see him taking another small sip and reached out, firmly placing her pointer finger on the bottom of the glass and slowly, but insistently, pushing up on it, so he'd need to drink more if he didn't want to spill it. Provided he didn't drop it or start gagging, she would continue to tip it up until he'd downed the whole thing. Really, drinking like that was just disgraceful. Plus she wanted to see if he was funny when drunk.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Tue Jan 27, 2015 10:07 pm

"Oh... is that so? Huh... I guess that's one way to have a tour, yeah..." Obie nodded slowly. That sounded... interesting? But um... What's a zoo? Whatever it is it has exhibits. Maybe really nice exhibits if they ended up doing that? I dunno... Obie kept nodding slowly in continued agreement, not exactly sure what he was agreeing too, though.

Apparently he was agreeing to more drink! All of it, right now! His droopy eyes grew wide as she pushed the glass upwards, causing Obie to quickly begin chugging the rest of his drink down lest he spill it on the table and incur her wrath. Oh god whyyyyy I wasn't that thirsty even though I like tea but aaaaaaa A few panicked, gulping seconds later, Obie grasped his now empty glass as he lay halfway slumped against their table.

"M-Miss Esmer... why did you do thaaaaaaat?" He hiccuped slightly. "I wasn't that t-thirsty today..." The slight onset of panic that came with his sudden guzzling was fading away, soon being replaced by an alcohol-induced state of drowsiness. I don't think this was really tea at allllll...
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Tue Jan 27, 2015 10:36 pm

"Yeah. I suppose. Although I'm pretty sure he has a girlfriend or something now. I mean, I could try and seduce him anyway, but... I mean the sex wasn't that good to be honest. He really seemed like the type to be more dominating, but he wound up being a TOTAL sub, which he was NOT cute enough for." She said before pausing, taking another sip.

"Well he was cute in the attractive sense, but he didn't make nearly enough, uh..." She shook her head. "Nevermind." She shrugged, this was just going to freak out the rabbit man.

Hm? Thirsty? "Oh, Obie, buddy. This isn't really tea, it's just called that. It's a lot of alcohol, actually." She said with a smile and a little pat on his shoulder before finishing her second glass.
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Wed Jan 28, 2015 12:59 am

"Ooohhhh, okay..." Obie drawled. "If you didn't like your time with him all that muuuch it'd probably not be worth it for you to track him down again, nuh-uh..." Wow it started to feel rather sleepy in this bar all of a sudden, why would they make a bar sleepy? That just didn't make any sense at all. Obie punctuated this point by slowly shaking his head as he went to lay it down on the table.

"It's a shame he disappointed you thouuughhh... Times like those are best when both people get to have a good time, yeah..." And now everything felt heavy? Miss Esmeralda sure picked a weird bar for them to drink in, that's for sure. "But don't worry, I'm sure you'll find someone that'll make you *hic* really happy and everything, mmhmm..." People should be happy, happy was nice. Especially for Hat Assassin Arrancar...

Ooooh, it wasn't actually tea at all! Well now that just made so much more sense, now didn't it? "But... Oh, okay... I guess that's okay. I like tea a lot more though..." It certainly explained why everything felt so drowsy now. Miss Esmeralda must be reaaaaaaally thirsty though... that was her second one... I hope she's not dehydrated. Keep your fluids up Miss Esmeralda...
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Wed Jan 28, 2015 6:02 pm

Esmer giggled at first at Obie's response. As he kept talking she found herself giggling more, beginning to full on crack up. Wow. She'd heard of sleepy drunks but this was ridiculous. One good glass of alcohol and he was already passing out. It was actually sort of sweet. Poor little Obie. Why did they send you here?

"It's quite all right. I don't need anyone to make me happy." There was the slightest bit of uncertainty in her voice, but that would hopefully go right over the drunken Obie's head. "I'm surprised, little rabbit man. I would have figured you for a complete prude." She said, genuinely surprised. Hm. Maybe she would have teased him more...
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Potatoes O'Brien

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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Thu Jan 29, 2015 12:58 am

"I-I'm not a rabbit!" Obie pouted slightly, looking up at Esmer from his head's resting place on the table. She was laughing now, laughing was good, right? And no longer a spooky laugh either! It was a happy laugh, and those laughs are good and not scary to a very drunk Obie.

"But I uh, yeah... Not a prude. I'm an adult and everything, I know... stuff. About stuff." Yes, good job totally-coherent Obie. "I means... I'm not afraid to talk about it and stuff, just because I hadn't had a girlfriend in a decade or so, it's all fine. We're all adults here, right?" He nodded his head on the table as he let out a small sigh.

Man, there was a lot of alcohol in Long Island Iced Teas. "But don't worry Miss Esmeraldas, I'm sure that you'll find someone that'll make you feel *yawn* super good, mmhmm..."
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PostSubject: Re: Obie in Blunderland   Thu Jan 29, 2015 1:29 am

"Well, rabbit man, I misjudged you." She said with another soft giggle. Maybe if they'd met on different terms she might have made friends with him. Friends friends, not that teasing mean kind of friends. Oh well. He looked like he was not long for the waking world today.

"Well, no worries Obie. You'll find someone else soon too." She said, giving him a reassuring pat. "Now go to sleep, little rabbit. I'll make sure you get home safely." She said, ruffling his hair soothingly, trying to ease his passage into sleepyland.
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